what do you do when he HATES valentines day?

you love him anyway.

yes, i must come out of the closet with this one. my dearest hubby HATES valentines day. he feels it has now become way too commercialized. and i get where he's coming from and i agree. really. the love you have for someone should be celebrated everyday. in many little and big ways. and he and i do. now, i'm not the mushy cheezy kind that gets all into it either. it's just that.... well...

he's made it extremely clear that he's not either. and it's been difficult for me these 17+ years with him. to be with someone i love who is violently opposed to this day of love. now don't get me wrong... he has totally come through on this front in ways that has blown my mind and also has left an "awwwe...he is amazing!" on the lips of friends and family. but you see, he's very public with his show's of love. other than love making, it's very minimal, and i usually have to initiate most forms of affection. it just doesn't occur to him...unless it occurs to him.

i am an affectionate person. not needy. just affectionate. not necessarily into "pda" (public demonstrations of affection), but reasonable and relevant shows of affection. hand holding. a rub here, a gentle touch there. and my favorite---great, mindblowing, intriguing, intimate, casual, soul bearing, matter-of-fact, "hey babe, how's your day?...well..." conversation. yes. conversation. its like foreplay for me. especially anything deep and intense and revealing..any topic..just deep and intense and revealing. but that's not him. mr. passive agressive.

so.. i got a couple of beautiful bouquets of flowers delivered to me beginning yesterday. my favorites. the card that came was anonymous, but the words were wonderful. something about being strong, courageous, inspiring, beautiful... all the stuff you'd want to be on a card that was with delivered flowers. i immediately suspected my daddy. that's totally like him!! but no, him it was not. i was very suspicious of hubby because i had figured that he had given in. after all, they were a combination of my top 2 most favorite flowers.

nope. not him.

my gut agreed with him. those were'nt his kind of words. and he would have NEVER had flowers delivered to me. NEVER.

so fast forward to today. this time rose came. and the card a bit more intimate. with talk of my sexiness, and how tinking of me makes them a happier person. that they love and admire me from afar. .... what the hell?!?

nah... had to be juan.

nope. not him.

this time he got a bit huffy puffy at the fact that i asked him intensely if it were him this time or not. "well, send them back" he said. lol!

i called the flower company and they said they'd check to see if the sender wished to stay anonymous. they did. but, the customer service rep did let slip that it was "a man" sending all the flowers. i am definately intrigued. theflowers are gorgeous. and i find myself wishing it was juan, not some far off admirer. i also found myself wishing that he gave a bit more of a damn than usual.

so, i was able to get my vday fix. beautiful flowers, sunshine, hugs and kisses from my ladybug and a card from my daddy. eventhough i didn't get it from the one i love. no cards. no flowers. no intimate dinner for two. no ... well, maybe some love making (of course he'll take that-but in his mind, it won't have anythhing to do with valentines day!!). what do you do when the one you love hates the day that you are to celebrate the love you have for one another all year long?

well, you love them anyway. in spite of themselves. because love truly rules. when you let it.

today is the day for LOVE---HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!

be well :)